Not bothered.

The brain injury fairy is trying their very best to push me over the edge at the moment. Last week, after I had finished an entire day at work, I couldn’t find my keys. I had forgotten were I put them and they were gone! Not bothered.

Those who know me know that this is an everyday thing for me. My wallet, keys, phone, vape and countless other important objects I need everyday are constantly being misplaced and lost.

Due to my brain injury symptoms, I am unable to work whilst being a student, something most students need to do to survive the three years of training. However, I’ve been doing this for 6 years and I am unable to work due to my symptoms, and now my PIP benefit has been refused! Not bothered. 

I’m not the brink of financial disaster

Soon my capital will run out and I won’t be able to afford to continue my studies with no money coming in. My court case is next year, and this will determine whether I am able to live independently for the rest of my life. If I am unsuccessful in the claim,  I am well and truly financially screwed for life. Not bothered.

There are no two ways about that.

I’ve been showering in the dark for the past week as the bulb that blew out in my bathroom was a fluorescent weirdly shaped coil, it looked like something out the operating rooms in area 51 they use to disect aliens or something.

A few weeks back, whilst driving on the motorway, something fell off the back of somebody’s car and flew right into my windscreen cracking it. Wasn’t bothered. 

Last year, a similar misfortune occurred when someone drove into the side of my car! These two happy events mean that my insurance has gone up from £300 a year to £900. Plus the excess cost, it all adds up when you haven’t earned money in 6 years.  Not bothered. 

Ouch

Work is increasingly dubious, I won’t even bother to write about it. It’s difficult having to hide my symptoms and my true story from people, but necessary, otherwise I’ll really have no chance of ever becoming a nurse. We’ll see what happens with that. Not bothered.

It is what it is

Ysterday the latch on the front door to my flat broke so me, mum and Reese were trapped inside! My landlord declined my calls and eventually turned his phone off. In the end I threw my keys out the window to a neighbour and thankfully she was able to let us back out. Not bothered. 

My concentration defecits at work are a big challenge

.. as are all my other symptoms. Depression and anxiety are always close by at the moment, so I need to keep on top of them. Not bothered. 

The secret to happiness is letting go

None of these events changes anything. We all go through peaks and troughs in life, so it’s best not to let the peaks or the troughs affect your true self. Here’s a demonstration of this:

Mikey you’re the best nurse ever represent our uni for us we’ll pay for you to go! 

Not bothered

Mikey staff have raised concerns about you perhaps nursing is too technical for you

Not bothered

 

 

 

i dont care.jpg

Whatever happens will happen, but whatever does happen won’t affect my mood or my inner being, one way or the other. Too much seems to happen to me for me to be bothered about anything. It’s all external, it doesn’t have to affect ME.

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